Hope the New Year has been going well so far for all of you. As for our little family, we've reached the one month anniversary of K.'s placement with us. Seems like it's been longer in some ways (can't remember life without him) and shorter in others (incredible how quickly he has adjusted to being with us). What has been great is that each day there is a new discovery, a new challenge and something to make us smile.
In terms of discoveries, K. comes up with them daily. He continues to develop his vocabulary and he has the words "hot" and "down" down pat. Though the word "hot" basically means anything that might be dangerous or anything that he can't touch. So Papa's computer is "hot". And as for "down", he helps make sure that the cat gets off the table if it ever jumps up - one day my head was turned and K. pointed his finger at the table and yelled, "down!". Sure enough, the cat was on the table and jumped down, suitably chastised... so at least we know that despite his limited vocabulary, K. is able to speak with other species.
Another discovery K. has made is all of his body parts and one in particular (one guess). He also has discovered that Daddy and Papa have the same body part and likes to make sure it's still there, especially when we're wearing our pyjama bottoms. This led to our discovery that K. needed his nails trimmed. :-) As for discoveries on my side, I guess you can say that I've been learning how to adjust to being the house husband with a toddler. It was rough finding things to keep him occupied until I realized that I could also go about my day and that he would just have to tag along. So he now watches as I do laundry, wash dishes, and cook (I made chocolate chip cookies and apple bread just to find something to keep him busy - I am sooo a Stepford Fag!). He also watches all my other activities that up until this point had been fairly private. So now when I shower I have a little face peeking in (and I do get flashes of Psycho when the shower curtain rustles) and K. is very much intrigued by the mechanics of elimination. I guess you can say that his potty training is beginning through modelling. Though I wish his observation wasn't quite so up close.
In terms of challenges, they are actually getting better overall. The tantrums have diminished and have downgraded to whining. Kind of like how a hurricane gets downgraded to a tropical storm. It's a relief, but you still have to board up the windows and sit tight. We are working on this though, and through Batshaw we have a parenting educator that comes in to give us advice from time to time. Some of it is useful, but other times it's like having a nagging in-law tell you how to parent your child. Our response has been to smile and nod and use what we feel works as best as possible. So far, it seems to be going well. We even had a few nights where K. waved goodnight to us from his bed and didn't howl as we left his room. (That was short lived though, the past two nights we are back to having to drop him back into bed after each time he climbs off of it). In fact the howling is so commonplace that when he is quiet we know he is up to no good (like climbing up on a chair and emptying all his drawers). And since he has trouble with sleep, we've had to make sure that if we drive back from an outing towards his bedtime, we have to keep him awake or else if he falls asleep in the car and is moved to bed, we'll have an hour of shrieking (as opposed to>the normal 20 minutes). So this saw me one time in the backseat next to him singing, "If you're happy and you know it shake your foot", and me shaking his leg repeatedly until we got home. Good times! heh. I'm now realizing the things parents have to do to get some peace. (So I can kind of forgive my mom for drugging my sister and I with Gravol so we would pass out on a very long car trip.)
As for things that make us smile, what I love is that he has a dance he does when I start my espresso machine in the morning. He sings along as the coffee beans are ground and shakes back and forth to simulate the grinding. Again, limited vocabulary, but if you ever need someone to do a sound effect for a coffee grinder, he's your man.
In terms of the placement, we are supposed to have a meeting scheduled at Batshaw with the birthfather and all the social workers this week.This is for K.'s social worker so that he can file a complete adoptability report. We hope it goes well, but aren't quite sure what to expect. In the meantime, we're still having a visit from a social worker at least once a week. They will probably taper off to one visit every few weeks as they all have seen how well he is fitting in. K. has also gotten to meet extended family and little cousins and has managed to charm them all.
So all in all, life is going well, one month of parental leave already gone. 8 to go. Not missing work yet. (colleagues yes, but not thework) Though there are moments I would rather be sitting in a 3 hour advisory meeting rather than watching the wiggles for the umpteenth time. (oh, the good news is that K.'s tolerance of Barney the dinosaur is about as great as mine. 5 minutes in and he's already waving bye- bye to the screen!)
Anyway, want to say thanks to all who have been writing back and glad that you're enjoying these little moments when I have a chance to breathe.
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